When Opposites Become Allies
by packycb23
Summary: Rose is just a normal witch with a huge family. But has Albus pushed her too far? This time she'll get revenge. And she knows just who to ask for help.
1. Preface

Stupid Albus. I swear, everything bad that has ever happened to me can be traced back to one of those bloody Potter boys. This is the last fracking straw.

Okay, okay, maybe I'm overreacting a bit. I mean, he only put a bit of blue colored potion on my toothbrush, right? WRONG! Between the two of them, my life has been nothing but one stupid practical joke after another. Now usually I'm pretty light hearted when it comes to pranks. In fact, I've been known to cause quite a bit of turmoil in my family members lives as well. But not today. Not on my first date with Jefferson Abercrombie, the hottest Hufflepuff this school has seen in a decade. No, there is no humor in what has happened today. After today, Albus will be bloody sorry he ever crossed me.


	2. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. I'm just a fan with too much free time.**

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><p>However, this isn't funny anymore. I mean seriously!<p>

Alright let's back up a bit. My name's Rose Weasley, Daughter of the great Ron and Hermione Weasley. Perhaps you've heard of them, everybody else bloody has. I'm a fifth year Gryffindor at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, top of my class I might add. Although he drives me mad, Al just happens to be my best mate, although I try not to tell him that too often (after all, his heads plenty big enough as it is.) My best girls would be Dom, Lucy, and Tabby Branstone (the last of which is not my cousin, but I love her anyway.)

Anyway, James, Al, and I have been pranking each other for years. I'm not even really sure who started it, but I know that it's caused more than a few fights over the years. Like on James' 10th Birthday when Al and I replaced his candle with a Weasleys' Whiz-Bang. It took quite a bit of potion to grow his eyebrows back, and Al and I got triple chores for a month. Or the time I put mustard in Al's Shampoo bottle. He smelled like a hotdog for weeks. They've gotten me plenty of times as well. Bras in the freezer, tying my shoes together, I've had my fair share of being the butt of the joke. And I've always laughed it off and started plotting my revenge, but not this time.

This time I have a date. My very first date, in fact. I keep scrubbing and scrubbing, but Al's no amateur. He's charmed this dye to stick around for a while. In fact, I think it's getting worse.

I grab my bag and head for the Great Hall. I have to meet Jeff at the Entrance in exactly 28 minutes, which gives me just enough time to find and murder Al. I run through the corridors and plot my revenge. This isn't going to be some silly little prank. No, I'm thinking of something much more devastating.

I haven't really been paying attention to where I'm going, so it shouldn't be that surprising when I run face first into something. The force knocks the wind out of me and I hit the ground.

"Vloody hell!" I scream. I reach up and touch my lips. I guess I was so focused on my teeth that I didn't notice my lips were swelling. Ughhhh, I'm gonna kill that boy.

"Wow there, Red."

I cursed silently. Only three people at this school call me Red. Al, James, and…

I look into his eyes. Of all his excellent features, his eyes are definitely my favorite. So silver they're almost clear, his eyes have been known to make girls of all ages completely lose their train of thought.

"Hello, Scorsius." He offers a hand and I grab it quickly, jump up, and let go just as suddenly. I look down at my shoes, hoping to draw attention away from my mouth.

"I see Al got you, then." He says. I look up and scowl. Well, at least I try to. It probably turned out to look more like a bloated fish with an under bite, but I think he got the point. "Don't be angry with me. You know Al. He's been spouting his plan off to every Slytherin who will sit still long enough. I'm surprised you didn't find out."

I don't know why he thought that was an excuse, but I just kept scowling. See, Scorpius and Al have been best mates since we got on the Hogwarts Express our first year. I don't really have a problem with Scorpius; we just don't have much in common. Honestly, he's a bit of a stiff, and he never speaks his mind. In all the years I've known him, I've never once seen him get angry. I'm still trying to figure out how he's friends with Al. Although we both spend most of our time with Al, I wouldn't call Scorpius and I friends. I mean he's okay, we're just… opposites.

"Where id he, Thcorthius? I'n gonna kill hinnn." My tongue was swelling now, too. If I didn't find Al soon, I wouldn't be able to talk at all.

"Slow down, Rose. I know you're upset, but just remember: If you kill him now, you can't get the anecdote."

See, that's the thing about Scorpius. I'm a firm believer in act now, think later. Scorpius on the other hand is an excellent planner. Which gave me an idea…

"Thcorthius, I need your helt….."

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	3. Chapter 2

**A/N: Short chapter to keep the plot moving. Enjoy :)**

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><p>I hate pink. I mean honestly, do I look like the kind of girl that would like a big bouquet of daisies and bows and Merlin knows what else? No. Strike One.<p>

But ohhh, it gets worse. While I awkwardly tote around my gaudy flowers, Jefferson Abercrombie mentions "The Famous Harry Potter". I ball my fist and bite my lip. Strike Two.

I held my breath and got my temper back. I smiled and changed the subject to Quidditch. That seemed safe enough. I loved Quidditch, even though I couldn't fly if my life depended on it. Everyone had tried to teach me. Dad, Uncle Harry, James, Al, Dom, even Uncle George gave it a go, but to no avail. I was hopeless on a broom. But I was still my Daddy's little girl, so I was a die-hard Chudley Cannons fan before I had gotten my first training wand. I understood Quidditch better than anyone in my family, even if I've never actually played.

We talked for a while about the World Cup, and I almost forgot about all the goofs Jeff made. I mean we weren't sole mates, but I could see us snogging a bit if it stayed like this.

We walked around the castle for a bit, but it was too beautiful of a day to stay inside, so we headed to the grounds.

We walked down to the lake a sat in the shade of the old beech tree, my favorite spot at Hogwarts. The sun shining off the lake was beautiful. Everything was perfect. I looked over and Jeff kissed me. It was nice. No fireworks or any of that garbage, but it was sort of sweet.

I slowly opened my eyes. I just knew I had a big goofy grin on my face.

"So, how 'bout a firewhisky?"

Bloody Hell. Strike Three. He's out.

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	4. Chapter 3

**A/N Hola readers! It's taken forever and a half, but here's chapter 3! It's also a bit longer, so you can't be too mad over how slow I am! Major Thank you to my wonderful beta QueenBlackII who made this chapter legible. Enjoy!**

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><p>Maybe I'll be a nun. Can witches be nuns? Well, either way I'm done with boys. The whole gender can piss off as far as I'm concerned.<br>I walk into the Gryffindor Common Room and slumped onto the sofa beside Lucy. Without even looking at me she sits her Ancient Runes book down and stands up.  
>"Kitchen?" she asks. One of the many reasons that as to why I love Lucy. Growing up with Molly has made her the perfect candidate for girl talk. No nosy questions, no cliché advice, just food and ears.<br>We walk down the hall in silence. Lucy is the only member of my family that truly appreciates the art of not having to talk.  
>James showed me the kitchen one month into my first year, and since then I've been a frequent visitor. In my opinion nothing beats a butter beer and a bowl of ice cream when you're just having one of those days. And if today isn't an excuse for eating my emotions then I don't know what is.<br>A house elf named Wally runs up to us with a tray filled with ice-cream. Note to self: Go easy on the binge eating.

"What would ya like, miss?" Wally asks Lucy.

"Just a cuppa please, Wally," Lucy says smiling at the scrawny elf.  
>He gives a little bow and scurries off.<br>We grab a seat at one of the tables and Luce turns to me eagerly. I grab a bowl of ice cream and try to decide where to begin.

"I'm never dating again," I say shoving the spoon in my mouth. I don't want to tell her what he said. She would probably nod along, but I'm sure she'll never understand why it's such a sensitive spot for me.  
>Okay, here's the thing, I'm a good student, I do my work, I never go out after curfew, and I write to my mum twice a week. Sometimes I have a bit of a smart mouth, but over all I'm what James would call a "goody goody". I try not to let it get to me, but James is the king of getting under my skin. So when he picked on me about not going to his birthday party last month, I went. And when he picked on me about not drinking, I drank. A lot. Let's just say no one stopped me from jumping up on a table and singing more One Direction songs then I would care to admit. Everyone at Hogwarts heard that story, but they didn't hear the rest. They didn't hear that Anthony Pritchard tried to take my shirt off in the broom cupboard while I screamed for help. They didn't hear that Scorpius had punched Anthony square in the face, and only two people knew that I then turned around a kissed Scorpius Malfoy right on the lips. Even though I was completely drunk, I still wake up in the middle of the night thinking about those lips.<br>But come on! It's Scorpius Malfoy, Mr Slytherin himself. I mean, sure he's actually really sensitive and thoughtful plus he's Al's best friend, but who can deny those eyes and that crystal blonde hair… Bloody Firewhisky. This was never a problem until that night.  
>I look at Lucy to see if she has any comments. While her being quiet makes for an awesome listener, it's not ideal when you need her to carry the conversation.<p>

"Ready to go back to the common room?" she asks.  
>I look down at my bizarrely empty bowl of ice cream. When did that happen?<br>I get up to leave. Well, Luce was a flop. Desperate times call for desperate measures, I've got to find Dom.  
>Dominique Apolline Weasley is the Hogwarts heartbreaker. She's the perfect combination of 18th Veela, and just enough Weasley to give her a fiery flare. She grew up watching Victoire and her boyfriend Teddy being sappy and mushy lovebirds. She tried to make me make an unbreakable vow when we were eight saying that I would never make a kissy face in public, but when mum caught us with her wand we had to change it to a pinky swear. Dom's life moto is "Never make a purchase when you haven't tested every model." She's mastered the art of lovin' and leavin'.  
>Long story short, if I've got a guy problem, Dom's got the solution.<br>I leave Luce in the common room and head up to the fifth year girls dorm. Dom's sitting in front of her mirror, reapplying lipstick. She locks eyes with me through her mirror. Before I can open my mouth she whips around and states "I know you have dirt, and you can't hide it from me. If you don't spill in the next 30 seconds I will be forced to hex you."  
>And there's Dom's down fall, she's the queen of gossip. Maybe I could talk to someone else about this.<br>I walk over to my bed and grab the first thing I see. "I don't know what you're talking about, I'm just up here to grab my, um, Potions Book!" Bam! I might just get out of this alive.

"You wrote your Potion's essay four days ago. I hate to do this to you but, Rictusempra!"  
>I collapse on the bed, gasping for air. I really thought she was bluffing. But no, she got me with a tickling charm, and there's no easy way out of this.<p>

"Stop! I… I... I'll tell you! Ju… Just… st… plea… STOP!"  
>She flicks her wand and takes off the charm. I try to steady my heart and get my breathing back under control. Forget the Cruciatus Curse; if I ever have to torture someone I'll just tickle them to death.<p>

She sits down beside me. "Spill."  
>I sigh, why didn't I go find Tabby? She grabs her wand and holds it menacingly.<p>

"Okay, okay! But you have to promise that you will never speak a word of this no matter what."  
>She nods and looks at me expectantly. So I spill. I tell her about the party, about the cupboard incident, the horrible date, and the deal I made with Scorpius this morning. I leave out the dreams; I don't think an unbreakable vow could keep Dom quiet about those.<br>"So basically I'm picking up two things," she says when I finish talking. "One, Jefferson Abercrombie is available."  
>I roll my eyes. I was wondering how long it would be before Boy Crazy Dom made an appearance. She grins and gives me a wink.<p>

"And two?" I ask impatiently.

"And two, you honey have a crush on Scorpius Malfoy.

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	5. Chapter 4

**A/N: Hey guys! Quick update, huh? As always, thanks to my wonderful beta QueenBlackII for proofing/adding quickly and efficiently!**

**Disclaimer: If I were JK Rowling, I wouldn't be so broke. Plus I'd have a better pen name. Just saying!**

I freeze. Don't give yourself away, Rose. You can blow this off. Just act cool.

"How the hell did you figure it out!?" Oops. That wasn't very cool.

Dom grins. "Three reasons." Good lord, for a pretty girl she sure likes making numbered lists. "One, we've been chums for life, Rosie! I know you better than you know yourself. Two, you just told me a story that belongs in a Muggle romance novel. I mean, honestly darling, I never pegged you as such a cheese ball. Lastly, and definitely my personal favourite, you've been mumbling his name in your sleep for weeks now. I knew it was either a crush or a plot for murder. Personally I'm just glad I won't have to help you hide a body."  
>And just like that I'm laughing. Honestly, I just can't figure this day out. It's like my entire world flipped upside down.<p>

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><p>Dom and I head down to the Great Hall for dinner. I wouldn't even be going if Dom wasn't forcing me; for the first time in my entire life I'm not in the mood for food. As we walk towards the Hall I spot Al and Scorpius are walking towards us.<p>

"Hi," Crap, I'm not supposed to be talking to Al, "um, Scorpius!" I cover. Dom snickers beside me. I'm definitely going to regret telling Dom anything.  
>Neither of the boys seemed to notice. Al is doing that thing were he's acting all offended, but I know he's still really proud of how good his prank was. I can't wait to get him back.<p>

"Mind if we talk for a bit, Rose?" Scorpius asks. Dom's eyebrows shoot up like rockets ready to fly into space.

"Sure! See you in a minute Dom." I say darting my eyes away from Al's.  
>Scorpius and I head into the empty charms room. I draw in a deep breath and try to compose myself. It's just Scorpius, Rose. You've known him for years. I spin around and give him a smile.<p>

"So what's the plan, Red?" he asks. Right. Plan. Here's the thing, when it comes to prank planning, my schemes are pretty hit or miss. Sometimes, I'm legendary, other times, not so much. But this time I can't risk a lame prank. This time I really want to get Al when he least expects it.

"Well, I have this one idea, and I really think we can pull it off. All we'll need is a hippogriff, 2 dozen rolls of Spellotape, enchanted boxers, Veritaserum, a few hundred Cornish pixies-"

"Woah, woah, woah! Slow down, Rose. As much as I'd love to see where you were going with that list, don't you think you guys have over done that sort of thing? I'm thinking we should go less physical and more mental. We should prank Albus on a more psychological level."

"You may be on to something there, Scorpius!" I say, majorly impressed. "When did you think of that?"

"Well," he says sheepishly, "I've secretly wanted to get Al since 3rd year when he charmed my quill to write dirty words. It made me get a T on a potions essay! But anyway, I've been thinking about it for a while now, I just never thought I would actually try and get him back."  
>Is it weird that my little crush on Scorpius just tripled?<br>"So, you've obviously spent some time thinking about this. What are your thoughts?"  
>He ponders this for a moment.<p>

"Okay, so Al knows your super pissed, right? So he's expecting you to get him back, which means he's going to be defensive, right?" I nod along. I'm still not sure where he's going with this. "And now he thinks I'm in on it, too. So really, all we have to do is look like were plotting something huge, while really the prank is that there's no prank at all! What do you think?" He said, his eyes gleaming with mischief and joy.

"Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy, you are an evil genius."

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><p>"Okay, so before we execute this brilliant plan of yours, we're going to need to have our parts down."<p>

"Alright, so basically anytime we're both around Al we have to act like we're hiding something. Also, we should probably act like we're really close friends now, ya know what I mean?"  
>I nod trying not to show too much excitement, freaky girl with a crush on him. Big no-no.<p>

"Um, right. In that case, you should start calling me Rosie. I only let my closest family members call me that."

"Alright, Rosie." He grins. "In that case, I guess you should call me Scorp. Usually only my mum can get by with that, but I'll let you slide under these circumstances."  
>Is he flirting? Is that flirting? Ugh, Dominique is rubbing off on me.<p>

"Alrighty then, Scorp." Well that's going to take some getting used to. "I guess Prank 'No Prank' is a go. We'll probably have to keep this between the two of us. If a Weasley finds out then it'll be a complete bust."

"Alright Rosie." Another smile. He sure is happy about all this. "I'll see you in a bit, then?" I nod. He turns and heads out of the room.  
>I sit on a desk and think about what just happened. I have a crush on Scorpius. I'm going to be spending quite a bit of time with him. We're going to be pretending we're best mates. Ohhh my…<br>My thoughts are interrupted by my stomach rumpling. Well, look at that. I got my appetite back.

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